I love the rain.
Really? Why have you been complaining about not being able to go to the shops and the roof leaking for the past 48 hours? – I don’t believe you.
I love the smell of freshly mown grass.
Really? Why are your eyes puffy, your cheeks red and there are Kleenex stuffed up each nostril? – I don’t believe you.
I love those ‘quirks’ you have.
Really? Why am I sleeping on the sofa? – I don’t believe you.
I love long walks on the beach.
Now you’re fucking lying.
I love your sense of humor.
Really? Why don’t you ever laugh then? – I don’t believe you.
My farts don’t smell.
Seriously? Please say that with a straight face. – I don’t believe you.
I love you.
OK. Now I believe you.