You broke a nail? A big metal nail? With a hammer?

No. A fingernail. And technically I didn’t break it. I cut it. With a knife.

A big rusty sword? An enchanted axe? An ogre killer?

No. A small kitchen knife.

Ooh! Were you fending off a burglar? A serial killer? Pirates?

No. I was chopping potatoes.

Oh. We expected more of you.

*Sigh*. I’m not saying I’m proud of it. But my partner is ill and so I’m cooking, cleaning, doing the washing, making cups of tea etc. etc.

Doesn’t sound like you….

True. But I am managing to maintain my macho, bad-boy image…

How?

I didn’t fold the end of the toilet-paper into a little triangle. Still a rebel at heart.

Oooh. You’re a bigger man than me.

That would mean more if you weren’t a little girl… Hah! The bitch is back!

๐Ÿ˜‰

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